I went to concert recently. It was a general admittance show, so there was no seating.
Per usual, two bands opened for the main act. The first one I had not heard of, but the second was another band I enjoyed.
The show itself was fantastic. The headliner was a band I had liked for a bit, but had not seen live yet. It was a ten-year anniversary tour for an album that shaped my late teenage years.
The last two shows that I had attended were not general admittance. I have another two shows coming up that are also not general admittance.
There was a valuable lesson for me in not having seats this time.
I joined the queue to enter the venue at around 6:30, and didn’t leave the venue until 11:00.
That’s four and a half hours of standing on hard floors. Two hundred and seventy minutes.
Now, this would have been fine half a decade ago. The year is no longer 2020. I’m grateful that is not the case, yet I find myself yearning for a certain part of those years.
My knees.
When I left and finally got in my car to drive home, my body left me an important message.
The friend seeing the show with me expressed concern over the noise I made. I would akin the sound that came out of my mouth to what a popped tire would sound like, if it could scream.
Physical pain was not the only anguish I felt then. The concert itself was a bitter reminder of who I was then and who I am now.
Biologists would agree that change is a part of what defines life. The ability to react to external stimuli is one difference between you from your kitchen sink…
I’d be a damn fool to sit here and tell you that change is not painful. That life itself is not painful.
In fact pain is only a universal constant, because change is as well. It seems like an endless cycle. Change causes pain, and that pain causes further change.
There is a massive oversight here though.
In your head, you visualize a circle. The circle infers a binary system.
Change isn’t a loop. Like living things, change is evolution. Growth not in a circular, or even linear direction, but directions we can not even fathom yet.
People get trapped between choice A, and choice B…
They have not considered, or even could consider choice H5 to the second power, divide by seven yet.
My point here is that change is human nature. Evolution is an advanced form of change, a long term growth.
But without pain? Change would not happen. There is no “I’m hungry, I’m going to go get food.” And when that is not present, there is no “My favorite restaurant is not open, so I’ll try this new place.”
A rudimentary example, sure.
But no large change has ever started without small change. And no small change has ever started without pain.
This long winded ramble leads to my own realization that night.
I’m not the person I was half a decade ago.
And I am beyond grateful for that.
Thank you,
-TME